Words of Truth

Rest in Peace. We know what these words mean. They mean that someone is no longer living, and we want them to be at peace after all the struggle of this world.

There’s only one problem with that: it’s not true.

Some people say that death is the end; that you simply cease to exist when you die. But I disagree.

Why do I disagree? Because I believe that the Bible is true. And according to the Bible, there are two groups of people: saved and unsaved. If you are trusting in Jesus Christ and His death on the cross to pay the penalty for your sin, then you are saved. If you are not, then you are unsaved.

For saved people it works like this: They are born, they live on earth, they die, and then they spend the rest of eternity in the presence of God in peace and joy.

For unsaved people it works like this: They are born, they live on earth, they die, and then they instantly enter a place of torment where they will stay until the Judgment at the end of the world at which point they will be thrown into the lake of fire to suffer forever.

You see, saved people are at peace, and they could be described as resting (when compared with the troubles of this world), but they aren’t asleep. Unsaved people are neither resting nor at peace.

Is this harsh? Yes. Sometimes the truth hurts, but we tell the truth. Why? Because it is what is best for the person that we love. And I love you. Whoever you are reading this, I love you. But not as much as God loves you. He provided a substitute for you. Someone who stood in your place so you would not have to go to that place of forever agony. And when you think about it, isn’t it just the craziest thing you’ve ever heard that there’s a way out of this problem, but some people don’t take the way out? MOST people won’t, according to Jesus Christ Himself.

This all hit me as I read messages people were posting about Robin Williams, messages of sadness, and hope that he will “rest in peace.” They even said “At least his suffering is over now.” But according to the Bible, if he did not trust in Christ while he was alive, then he’s suffering more right now than he ever did on earth. He thought he was ending his pain, but he only hastened the most unimaginable torment ever. That saddens me.

And all I can think about is this: how much time do we waste on stuff that isn’t important? And what is more important than knowing where you will spend forever? For those who have already died, their choice is set, but you, if you are reading this: there’s still time for you.

Don’t waste it.

I used to read Scott Adams’ comic strip “Dilbert.”  I also read his books.  In one of them he wrote about people he called “obliviots.”  The word is a portmanteau of “oblivious” and “idiot.”  It is a way of describing someone who is oblivious to the fact that they are being inconsiderate of the people around them.  One example is someone who blocks the entire shopping aisle with their cart so nobody can get by.

Here’s an example from yesterday.  At my local grocery store there are six “Express self-checkout” stations.  These are stations for you to purchase less than 12 items.  And then there are four or five self-checkout stations with a conveyor belt so that people can self-checkout a cart full of stuff.   I pushed my cart (with more than 12 items) to the checkout, and saw two things:  1. All six express checkouts were open and available. 2. All but one of the non-express lanes were being used.

Here you can see stations 1-6 WERE empty, a woman just arrived at station 3, and the woman at station 4 is an employee cleaning it. The offender is wearing the grey soccer shirt. 

I pushed my cart towards the empty non-express lane, when a guy with three kids (looked to be between ages 9 and 14) jumped in ahead of me.  He had no cart.  As I watched, he allowed each of his kids to swipe their item (each item was smaller than a deck of cards…I couldn’t tell what they were). Then he messed around with his payment method and finally left.  Was it a huge inconvenience for me? Not really.  But it was a point in my day that perhaps God had put there to remind me to be patient with people.  I’m sure if I had a time machine and could go back to just before the process and freeze time, I could ask the guy, “Ok sir, you have two options here:  you could use any one of six express checkouts to pay for your 3-4 items, or you could utilize the non-express checkout, thereby making other people with more than 12 items wait for five minutes longer while you pay for your kids’ items.  What do you think?”  I’m sure he would say, “Well, the obvious choice is to use one of the express lanes.”

But I don’t have a time machine. And this guy learned nothing.  But I got to practice patience and understanding.  You see, we all have the potential to be obliviots.  Sometimes we just don’t think.  Sometimes we say or do things without thinking through the effect that we will have on others.  I know I have the potential to open my mouth and put my foot in many times a day.  And so I’m taking this as a reminder to  be considerate to others, to be loving, and to be understanding that we all make mistakes, because we’re human.

I like making people laugh.  I have been told (by my wife and others) that I am at my funniest with situational humor. This is something I can’t plan, it’s unpredictible.  This is where I say something funny in the moment that was not planned.

Obviously I can’t rely on funny situations to be around all the time, so sometimes I rely on telling jokes to make people laugh.  My favorite short joke is “Why don’t lobsters share?  Because they’re shellfish.”  I probably know over a thousand jokes, because I can remember most jokes after hearing them once.  They sit there in my memory waiting for something to remind me of the joke.  Mention an animal, and I probably know a joke about it.  Sports, etc.

All that being said, I dislike when I hear jokes being told wrong.  Sometimes people mess up the punchline.  But the worst thing you can do to a joke is to make it longer than necessary by using “filler.”  The longer the joke, the less funny it is. People frequently have the character in a joke doing something three times before the punchline.  Ask yourself: would it be funny if he only did it once?  Then don’t have it three times.

Here is an example of a long joke I found on the internet:

“Sir you have got to help!” said the tearful man at the door. “There is a family that I know very well that is in desperate need of money. The Father has been out of a job for over a year, they have five kids at home with barely a bit of food to eat. The worst part is, that they are about to kicked out of the house and they will be left on the streets without a roof over their heads!” The man concluded with one last heart wrenching sob. “Well,” said the man at the door, “that really is a sad story. Why don’t you come inside and we’ll talk about it a little more.” “So how much money is needed exactly?” asked the man when they were both seated. “Oh it’s really terrible”, said the man starting up again, “why just for the rent $3000 is needed by tomorrow otherwise they’ll be kicked out onto the streets.” “How do you know so much about this situation?” asked the man as he reached for his check book. “Well,” said the man breaking down once more “they are my tenants.”

Now I will tell the joke, removing all the extra, unnecessary parts.

Please help!” said the man at the door. “This family I know is very poor! They have no money and no food, and they’re about to be evicted from their house!” The homeowner said, “That’s horrible! Are they your relatives?” “No,” said the man. “I’m their landlord.”

Here’s another example: if your joke contains the words “….and without missing a beat…”  it’s too long.  Examine your jokes and break them down to the absolute minimum parts before you tell them.  Do those words you were going to put in there add anything to the joke?  No?  Then leave them out.  Your audience will thank you.

When I was in my 20’s I laughed at people who used a paper towel to open the bathroom door.  Then I went to nursing school and took microbiology.  I don’t laugh anymore. Now I AM the one holding the paper towel.  I’m not germophobic, I just have a healthy respect for germs and the damage they can do.

Coming from a nurse, here is how you should wash your hands:

1. Turn on the faucet and get your hands wet.
2. Get some soap and rub it all over your hands for about 20 seconds, working up a lather. Make sure to get in between your fingers and under your nails. Here’s a tip: singing “Happy Birthday” twice is about 20 seconds.
3. At this point, you will be tempted to reach out and turn off the water, because of your public school education where you learned that wasting water is akin to beating baby seals.  Don’t do it.  Consciously remove your hands from the water, and reach for the towel/paper towels/air dryer.  If the air dryer has a button, hit it with your elbow.
4. After your hands are totally dry (sometimes it takes two cycles of the dryer), then you can use the paper towels to turn off the water. Voila! Your hands are clean!

This brings up a problem I’ve noticed in the last several years: the lack of paper towels in some bathrooms.  Now, am I anti-hand dryer?  No.  Actually I really like the Xlerator hand dryer by Excel.  If you’ve ever used one of those, it feels like the dryer is forcibly removing the water from your skin at Mach 2.

The problem exists when there are no paper towels, and the bathroom door opens IN.  That means you could have been immaculate, washed your hands like a surgeon scrubbing in, and dried them off completely with the blow dryer, but the instant you touch that door handle, your hands are as dirty as if you hadn’t even washed at all, assuming someone else didn’t wash (and we know this happens).

My local library is trying to be as hygienic as possible: You go in the bathroom and the toilet flushes itself.  The faucet and soap dispensers are both motion activated.  The hand dryer is also motion activated.  And then you look at the door handle.

Let me give you an illustration.  Let’s say Jim is the first person to use the bathroom that day.  Let’s say good ole Jim doesn’t wash his hands, and gets his germs all over the handle.  Let’s say 50 people use the bathroom after him.  Now how many of those people have clean hands?  Zero.

What is the answer? If businesses are really serious about hand hygiene, they need to either make the doors open OUT, or provide some kind of entryway that requires no door, but still ensures privacy.  Movie theaters do this.  For now, I guess I’ll just keep grabbing some toilet paper to open the door, and throwing it on the floor near the door.

EDIT:  Evidently hand dryers are bad too.